Some people get an exorcism, while other people go to the funny farm.

An exorcism, could be safer, but probably not for the people doing it. Also, don’t think they do that at the hospital.

At least, if I had another bad drug reaction, I’d already be at the hospital.

If all thoughts are automatic, what does it mean when somebody asks “if you need to think about it”? And how does reading work? And how does counting in head work?

Guess a definition of “thought” is needed.

Apparently some people have images in their head while awake. I can sort of think of images, but it isn’t very vivid or useful.

Not many if any automatic thoughts in my head after leaving the funny farm. Thinking, is basically talking to myself, in my head all day long. If I don’t do it, then I’ll either get bored, or unwanted thoughts.

But it was better in the past, when I could stare off into space, and have no thoughts. Now I’d get bored and be thinking.

Good news, everything humans currently think they know and understand, will likely change. Like it always does.

The counselor asked if I still missed Tonka. Didn’t have an answer when she asked me though.

When sleeping someday after that, I remember saying I miss Tonka. And I might have been crying in my head too, don’t know about out loud.

Apparently I know more when sleeping.

Must have nothing to cry over lately. Or maybe I stopped processing my feelings again. Easy to do, some drugs make some people numb.

Apparently that’s one of many Zoloft side affects.

But should that happen all the time to be a side affect?

Not that long ago, I woke up, and felt like somebody was by me. And it didn’t go away when I was wide awake either.

Didn’t start until after Tonka died though.

Good luck proving somebody is or isn’t there though. Humans can’t even see everything. Or hear everything.

Serotonin syndrome sounds fun. Previous drug for depression, can cause it too.

On the Zoloft page, it says taking it and buspirone can cause that. So why was I on buspirone? Took it incorrectly, think she increased it, and was supposed to take more till I got the new pills. Forgot, and kept taking too much.

But serotonin syndrome doesn’t mention Invega.

I only gained 1.8 pounds, in a week or so.

Good reason to not use drugs, they all have side affects.

Well, never seen a Big Foot.

But Little Foot could exist, if I could get some medicine to make me covered in fur.

Just be careful, the government might try to capture me.

There’s one guy, that says he gets incredibly tired.

Well, psychosis did the same to me. Still tired.

Maybe some people can turn their psychosis on and off.

Not sure I can get that, without the wrong drugs. Never wanted to take psychedelics, and won’t. But looks like legal drugs can do some strange shit too.

Well, not a man.

But she only lets out a loud meow once, and not near me. So no idea why she does that. If she wanted something, one meow and then doing nothing, doesn’t make sense.

She meows quietly though. Sometimes when I’m talking to her.

And she might have just meowed at the chair, while she was climbing or jumping on it. Getting something to put on it soon, so she can keep scratching it, without ruining the chair.

Need to see if she will scratch that thing, and if it actually stays on the chair. If I get a new chair, I’ll need to get a chair compatible with that scratching thing.

I have another scratcher by the chair, but she doesn’t like it.

Can’t spray the chair today with Pet Block, she has no scratcher in this room. And that chair is broken, so I don’t care. Probably will be going to the dump. Apparently brand new $700 recliners last about five years.

Easy to get a new perspective, psychosis.

Paranormal? Psychosis can explain some of it.

Invega resulted in some strange shit happening in my head.

Bunch of religious BS. I just took away “we’re all going to be okay”.

And the next day of no Invega, a bunch of strange shit stopped in my head. They had to change all my medicine though.

I remember looking up Invega, and it had some strange side effects.

Need to charge my Kindle. Most of the books on it are probably paranormal. The library has eBooks. Rather read about animals.

The episode of Expedition X I just watched, basically said some birds are big enough to eat an adult cat. Think they mentioned Eagles, well, probably true. I saw a big bird flying a while ago. Can’t remember if I was in hospital or not though.

Psychosis might explain Jesus too. I wonder, is there “shared” psychosis?

Doesn’t everybody want to share psychosis with their SO?

Everybody will like what they like, believe what they believe, and do what they do.

I liked the last episode that I just watched because, she had a blind fold and ear plugs on.

Well, some odd things appeared to happen.

Not sure I’d do that myself though. Got too much thinking to do.

Some odd timing for a breathing noise, and the things she said. But if staged, good job. Doesn’t matter to me either way.

Anybody can watch it for whatever reason they want. I don’t know enough to say what is or isn’t possible in the universe or anywhere else.

I still need to search for Greek Mythology on the streaming video site for the library. Might have something interesting to watch on that subject too.

What is something I can do about? My feelings. Don’t like a feeling, I can re frame my thoughts. Well, the counselor said that about agitation. Not sure I ever completely stopped doing that after it worked with agitation. Not sure completely stopping will work either.

Might get easier though.

Well, the printer was clogged since January 12th. Cause I must have printed a test page then, and it printed after I unclogged it.

Printed another page too, and no issues. Before unclogging it, I looked up the Brother HL-2140 and openSUSE Tumbleweed, and it uses Brother HL-2060 Foomatic/hl1250, according to the openSUSE wiki.

So it still works just fine, good to know. In case I need to print, I don’t need a different printer.

I can re frame the “lazy” and “took a long time” thoughts as well.

I don’t like feeling bad, so I think I’ll just re frame a lot of thoughts.

Also, it seemed to get less intensive really quickly before today as well, the thinking.

No medicine is going to 100% solve mental illness or any feeling. Re framing seems to help me a lot though.

Also, nobody can help me, if I don’t help myself. Doesn’t matter who I ask either.

May or may not need to read the OCD book. First I need to re frame my thoughts. I can test it out on the book as well. Just did so with the printer.

Unscrewed one screw, then thought, that there has to be another way to get the paper out. I just had to remove the toner and drum. I don’t remember everything, and it probably happened before. But I don’t use it very often. Good to have it though. Didn’t want to do that, and ended up doing it anyways. So I could have re framed that, and removed it anyways to begin with. But that doesn’t matter, it’s unclogged.

Memory problem or not, the best thing for me to do is focus on now.

Apparently ADHD symptoms, are similar to manic depression symptoms.

Or is just having messed up sleep, enough for it to be manic depression?

Nothing like waking up early, to pee, then not being able to fall back a sleep for hours, and then only getting an extra 1-2 hours of sleep. All cause I was thinking too much.

I wonder how long I’ve done that though or been able to do that. I remember in the past, I could just think a bunch if I wanted to.

But who said I can’t stop? Only me. Also, I kind of started already. I was re framing a whatever a thought is. Apparently a thought describes more then one thing. A feeling, must be a thought. A word might be a thought. Some people can think with pictures. What about impulses?

Well, it was better, when my head was nice and empty. I wonder, people that mediate, how does it work, if you just keep thinking?

No wonder sleeping is better. I don’t have to try and think. It’s easy, and fast, and I don’t have to do anything. I have slept for 10+ hours before, but didn’t have to do anything.

Well, I can make the time fly easily by thinking too. Just don’t look at a clock, and just think..

Well, I could ask a lady, if they want to get manic now.

I wonder what the difference between manic depression and ADHD is. They both have fast thinking. Or is racing thoughts different? No idea, sounds the same to me.

Racing thoughts sounds helpful. This, not so much.

Well, I could always run around in a circle, and try to catch my tail.